Hello to all my new friends, old friends, and family. We’re trying something new today.
I’ve been saying since the beginning that I want The Well-Lived Life to be a supportive community where we grow together. Now that I’ve stepped away from my teaching job to become a full-time writer, I’m going to start making good on that statement.
This is the first of many “discussion threads” on this platform. I have a question, and I want to hear from anyone who’s part of this 2100-person strong community.
Here’s today’s question: What is your version of a “well-lived life?” In other words, what does that look like/feel like to you?
Much love and happiness, I look forward to hearing from you :)
I am so blown away by the quality of these! Adrian, I completely agree that cheese must be involved. Alana, animals are so necessary. Elaine, thank you for bringing attention to those issues. Sam, you're so right about purpose! And Paola... Freedom and connection are the spice of it all!
I can't believe how wise you all are! Thank you for taking the time to write these wonderful answers. Anyone can tell you've all lived some varied, interesting lives. I'm just amazed. I hope some more people write in, because this is lovely :)
Alright! So these aren't all adjectives, so we'll call them... Good-life describers. I pulled some descriptors out of today's answers to find something to meditate on for the future :)
A well-lived life? A simple, stand on your own feet, not white-knuckling relationships and material things but rather holding on to a personal discovered purpose. I think it should feel as if you have accepted that life is difficult. In a way, it looks like a person who has learned continuous intentional and willing acceptance of experiences, moments and human interactions for how they are or later become.
Sam I loved that yours packed so much wisdom in a straight-to-the-point answer. There's so much truth to this! Simplicity is so key to so many things in life.
A well-lived life? One that is relaxed because the problems in the world and in one’s own life are not allowed to get the upper hand. One in which fun figures on a daily basis. One where we are motivated with a purpose that gives our lives meaning. One that is stoic when undeniably bad things afflict us, remembering that time will heal, and that good things may emerge that otherwise wouldn’t have. One where we strive to stay healthy in body and mind. One that fights pessimism, always knowing that where there is room for doubt there is room for optimism. And one that recognises that we are all somewhere on the luck spectrum - most of us are replete with unimaginable luck compared to literally millions of others in the world. A well-lived life has the humility to appreciate that behind every achievement is a massive dose of compounded luck, and that achievement can be endowed with purpose if it can become a catalyst for the redistribution of luck. For me, a well-lived life must also involve cheese, but I’ll admit that’s debateable.
Adrian, thank you so much! I really appreciate what you said about luck meeting achievement/purpose, I've been trying to think of a way to phrase this for ages. Can I quote that in future?
I'm going through and collecting key adjectives to see where people's heads are at! In yours I'm seeing:
A well-lived life is a life of freedom and connection. Freedom to be your true self without getting trapped in anyone’s expectations; to live where you want to without a visa holding you back; to have the opportunities to choose your next steps. Connection with every single person that touches your heart; constantly improving yourself in benefit of society and always seeking for new people, new cultures, new habits; to bring us together and make the world better!
Paola, I love it! Freedom to be yourself is so important. Connection is one that I'm still working on, but that I'll be putting a lot more effort into in the next year. It's so important that we invest in keeping around the people who matter.
Live with love for all beings - and work to defend the helpless, be they the elderly, the very young or fellow animals (we are not vegetables or minerals, we are all animals). There are such strong forces working against the helpless - a well-lived life is one devoted to reducing suffering, encouraging people to be compassionate, to cause no harm. So much needs to be done. Find others if you can but don't give up because they do, if they do. And find some time to rest and recharge. There is always something to be done. Right now, there are forces working to expand hunting and trapping on wildlife "refuges" - yes, really! So who will speak up about this? Or about the factory farms? or the animal labs? If you do, you can feel you have done something.
Elaine, I love that you called intention to an issue in a post about calling attention to issues :) I can tell that your heart is huge! Yes, we have a responsibility (especially if we've been blessed with luck, as Adrian said) to help others!
A life lived intentionally. Some COVID days I find myself rudderless and have to sit down and be still to find out what’s important? Some days I get a clear answer, others not so much. But on the days I can refocus on what’s important to me - beyond the bills and medical appointments, of which there have been many recently, what is important to feed my soul? Usually, that includes doing something with or for someone else - not always easy in times of mandated isolation. Zoom is getting so tiresome! I need in person contact to help me connect on a deep level. And otherwise, my well-lived life involves nature, animals, good fresh food, writing, contact with another human, and acts of kindness, random or not. I need beauty in my life which comes in all sorts of ways to me, not just aesthetic loveliness (which can be very nourishing ) but the astonishing beauty of an unexpected moment of vulnerability between people or an perfect insect or silence. It’s a good day when my breathe has been taken away at least once. Thanks for this question and this thread. I’ll be interested to read other folks’ posts.
Alana, wow! This is beautiful. The people around us are so important to help us live well. Thank you for being so vulnerable! I love the way you used the way "beauty."
key adjectives I'm seeing: Intention, what is important, contact, connection, kindness, beauty, vulnerability, silence.
Hey Aaron...I have loved reading your encouraging and supportive articles on medium.....now...my meaning of a well lived life....As I am still working full time in my medical career, I find that work / life balance in so very important and vital to my emotional being. With that being said, living without regret is vital, and not even trying to please all, as we know, that is an impossible task! My life revolves around doing things for others, as this is most important to me.. and giving back to my community, family and friends. A life well traveled is also important, to see the beauty in our world from different perspectives. Also important is avoiding self doubt and strongly avoid negativity, and avoid those that are in our lives that are consumed with negativity.......just a brief overview...thanks for what you do Aaron! Keep it up! With much appreciation , Noble
Mmmmm Noble, preach on! That was such a great answer. I'm so happy that you see service as such an important part of a well-lived life! You're awesome :) I think that giving back and seeing the world are such powerful motivators!
Hi Aaron, I just subscribed to your page after reading an article you posted on Medium. I'm from London and just graduated 2 weeks ago and started my journey on finding a right career path. This week has been difficult as some days I lay in bed all day and wonder what I am supposed to do and the fear of finding the right 'job'. I've always said to myself that I will find a job that I truly enjoy and something that stands on the right side of the world (e.g. finding an ethical company to work for etc). Even though 'working and earning money' is not the end goal, I have come to a realisation that finding a purpose in life is somewhat a greater thing for myself and I guess my mental wellbeing. As I start my adult life, I am searching for the well-lived life and the journey seems daunting yet exciting. I hope I can find a good balance of work life, social life and keep on working on my personal growth. I haven't quite answered the discussion point but wanted to let you know that I appreciate your posts and good luck for the future!
Wow, Dee, you're at such a beautiful crossroads. I'm also in a very transitional period, it can be scary! What are some things you love that you can spend time doing during this job search? I've found that focusing on what you love and pursuing it with intensity can be an incredible balm for the fear we experience in transitional periods.
If you're concerned with finding purpose, I listened to this podcast episode with Jacqueline Novogratz a few weeks ago, and it gave me a whole new beautiful perspective on purpose. Highly recommend it!
I am so blown away by the quality of these! Adrian, I completely agree that cheese must be involved. Alana, animals are so necessary. Elaine, thank you for bringing attention to those issues. Sam, you're so right about purpose! And Paola... Freedom and connection are the spice of it all!
I can't believe how wise you all are! Thank you for taking the time to write these wonderful answers. Anyone can tell you've all lived some varied, interesting lives. I'm just amazed. I hope some more people write in, because this is lovely :)
Alright! So these aren't all adjectives, so we'll call them... Good-life describers. I pulled some descriptors out of today's answers to find something to meditate on for the future :)
love, defend, devoted (to reducing suffering), encouraging, compassionate, rest, speak up
simple, independent, personal purpose, acceptance, connection, freedom, opportunities, improving, seeking, new, intention, (asking) what is important, contact, connection, kindness, beauty, vulnerability, silence, relaxed, fun, purpose, stoic, healthy, optimism, luck, humility.
A well-lived life? A simple, stand on your own feet, not white-knuckling relationships and material things but rather holding on to a personal discovered purpose. I think it should feel as if you have accepted that life is difficult. In a way, it looks like a person who has learned continuous intentional and willing acceptance of experiences, moments and human interactions for how they are or later become.
Sam I loved that yours packed so much wisdom in a straight-to-the-point answer. There's so much truth to this! Simplicity is so key to so many things in life.
Key adjectives I'm seeing in yours:
simple, independent, personal purpose, acceptance
A well-lived life? One that is relaxed because the problems in the world and in one’s own life are not allowed to get the upper hand. One in which fun figures on a daily basis. One where we are motivated with a purpose that gives our lives meaning. One that is stoic when undeniably bad things afflict us, remembering that time will heal, and that good things may emerge that otherwise wouldn’t have. One where we strive to stay healthy in body and mind. One that fights pessimism, always knowing that where there is room for doubt there is room for optimism. And one that recognises that we are all somewhere on the luck spectrum - most of us are replete with unimaginable luck compared to literally millions of others in the world. A well-lived life has the humility to appreciate that behind every achievement is a massive dose of compounded luck, and that achievement can be endowed with purpose if it can become a catalyst for the redistribution of luck. For me, a well-lived life must also involve cheese, but I’ll admit that’s debateable.
Adrian, thank you so much! I really appreciate what you said about luck meeting achievement/purpose, I've been trying to think of a way to phrase this for ages. Can I quote that in future?
I'm going through and collecting key adjectives to see where people's heads are at! In yours I'm seeing:
relaxed, fun, purpose, stoic, healthy, optimism, luck, humility.
Oh and cheese! Though that's not an adjective, but it's possibly the most important!
Of course - very happy for you to quote any part of that. Great idea to have this thread!
A well-lived life is a life of freedom and connection. Freedom to be your true self without getting trapped in anyone’s expectations; to live where you want to without a visa holding you back; to have the opportunities to choose your next steps. Connection with every single person that touches your heart; constantly improving yourself in benefit of society and always seeking for new people, new cultures, new habits; to bring us together and make the world better!
Paola, I love it! Freedom to be yourself is so important. Connection is one that I'm still working on, but that I'll be putting a lot more effort into in the next year. It's so important that we invest in keeping around the people who matter.
Key adjectives I'm seeing: connection, freedom, opportunities, improving, seeking, new.
Live with love for all beings - and work to defend the helpless, be they the elderly, the very young or fellow animals (we are not vegetables or minerals, we are all animals). There are such strong forces working against the helpless - a well-lived life is one devoted to reducing suffering, encouraging people to be compassionate, to cause no harm. So much needs to be done. Find others if you can but don't give up because they do, if they do. And find some time to rest and recharge. There is always something to be done. Right now, there are forces working to expand hunting and trapping on wildlife "refuges" - yes, really! So who will speak up about this? Or about the factory farms? or the animal labs? If you do, you can feel you have done something.
Elaine, I love that you called intention to an issue in a post about calling attention to issues :) I can tell that your heart is huge! Yes, we have a responsibility (especially if we've been blessed with luck, as Adrian said) to help others!
Key adjectives I'm seeing: love, defend, devoted (to reducing suffering), encouraging, compassionate, rest, speak up.
A life lived intentionally. Some COVID days I find myself rudderless and have to sit down and be still to find out what’s important? Some days I get a clear answer, others not so much. But on the days I can refocus on what’s important to me - beyond the bills and medical appointments, of which there have been many recently, what is important to feed my soul? Usually, that includes doing something with or for someone else - not always easy in times of mandated isolation. Zoom is getting so tiresome! I need in person contact to help me connect on a deep level. And otherwise, my well-lived life involves nature, animals, good fresh food, writing, contact with another human, and acts of kindness, random or not. I need beauty in my life which comes in all sorts of ways to me, not just aesthetic loveliness (which can be very nourishing ) but the astonishing beauty of an unexpected moment of vulnerability between people or an perfect insect or silence. It’s a good day when my breathe has been taken away at least once. Thanks for this question and this thread. I’ll be interested to read other folks’ posts.
Alana, wow! This is beautiful. The people around us are so important to help us live well. Thank you for being so vulnerable! I love the way you used the way "beauty."
key adjectives I'm seeing: Intention, what is important, contact, connection, kindness, beauty, vulnerability, silence.
Beautifully put. thank you.
Hey Aaron...I have loved reading your encouraging and supportive articles on medium.....now...my meaning of a well lived life....As I am still working full time in my medical career, I find that work / life balance in so very important and vital to my emotional being. With that being said, living without regret is vital, and not even trying to please all, as we know, that is an impossible task! My life revolves around doing things for others, as this is most important to me.. and giving back to my community, family and friends. A life well traveled is also important, to see the beauty in our world from different perspectives. Also important is avoiding self doubt and strongly avoid negativity, and avoid those that are in our lives that are consumed with negativity.......just a brief overview...thanks for what you do Aaron! Keep it up! With much appreciation , Noble
Mmmmm Noble, preach on! That was such a great answer. I'm so happy that you see service as such an important part of a well-lived life! You're awesome :) I think that giving back and seeing the world are such powerful motivators!
Thanks Aaron! Keep up with your motivational articles! Look forward to your next one!
Hi Aaron, I just subscribed to your page after reading an article you posted on Medium. I'm from London and just graduated 2 weeks ago and started my journey on finding a right career path. This week has been difficult as some days I lay in bed all day and wonder what I am supposed to do and the fear of finding the right 'job'. I've always said to myself that I will find a job that I truly enjoy and something that stands on the right side of the world (e.g. finding an ethical company to work for etc). Even though 'working and earning money' is not the end goal, I have come to a realisation that finding a purpose in life is somewhat a greater thing for myself and I guess my mental wellbeing. As I start my adult life, I am searching for the well-lived life and the journey seems daunting yet exciting. I hope I can find a good balance of work life, social life and keep on working on my personal growth. I haven't quite answered the discussion point but wanted to let you know that I appreciate your posts and good luck for the future!
Wow, Dee, you're at such a beautiful crossroads. I'm also in a very transitional period, it can be scary! What are some things you love that you can spend time doing during this job search? I've found that focusing on what you love and pursuing it with intensity can be an incredible balm for the fear we experience in transitional periods.
If you're concerned with finding purpose, I listened to this podcast episode with Jacqueline Novogratz a few weeks ago, and it gave me a whole new beautiful perspective on purpose. Highly recommend it!
https://tim.blog/2021/05/04/jacqueline-novogratz/
A well-lived life is a life that accepted/accepts its circumstances and death without sadness, anxiety or hatred.